Mauser (mauser) wrote in manbashingads,

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Damn Marketdroids!

Anyone who knows me is well aware of my absolute loathing for the advertising and marketing industry and the "People" who populate it. Mostly this is because of the egregious assaults they make on the language and the culture in order to not so much make the sale, but to soften you up for the eventual salesman. Advertising long ago made the shift from trying to tell you the merits of a product to telling you how much you suck for not buying it.

One of the worst assaults on the culture is the ongoing effort to Deconstruct Masculinity. That's what I created manbashingads for. (This is crossposted to both this and my personal blog).

But one should also consider the advertising industry's assault on the English language. For me, this goes back to the days of my Dad yelling at Burger King commercials about the pronoun disagreement in the jingle that sang "Everyone doing things their own way." (Blame feminism and political correctness for the death of the male pronouns serving double duty as gender neutral. That's why we don't have Policemen and Firemen any more, but Police Officers and Fire Fighters.)

But it's not just political correctness, playing fast and loose with grammar is a staple of an industry that is about lying but not lying by a technicality. In AdWorld, for example, Chocolaty is a NOUN, not an just adjective. The worst example of this was a "chocolate" snack cake I saw advertised once that was described as "Chocolaty cake filled with Chocolaty and layered with Chocolaty". There was no actual chocolate involved, just Cocoa, but it was the weird construction of the sentence that clued me in so that I could see it later. Marketers will say "Chocolaty Frosting" instead of "Chocolate Frosting" because apparently there are regulations about how much actual chocolate has to be in something before they can use the word. I applaud this one area of Federal regulation because otherwise Marketers would try to sell us carob, or mud (same difference really) as Chocolate or at least "Chocolate flavored".

But, the target of my current ire is Kentucky Fried Chicken.

They have now started advertising "Boneless Wings". Wow, Chicken Wings without the bone! How do they do that? They make them out of breast meat. The little text at the bottom of the ad says so.

Huh? Since when is a breast a wing? Since Wing became a marketing term for the form factor of a tiny shred of meat, instead of a real part of a bird. Just like Chocolaty doesn't mean Chocolate, now they don't even have to pretend to be an adjective. Just let the Ad Men redefine your reality for their convenience. Breast = Wing, 2 + 2 = 5, Mr. Winston, and There is no Spoon.
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